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Hello my name is Jerral Campfield and this web site is dedicated to Moral Recognition Therapy using Biblical principles. Please come back often to join me in understanding Gods hands are outstretched still to forgive.

Violence Part 2  E-mail
Contributed by Jerral Campfield   
Friday, 03 June 2005

4. ANGER 

Here are some ways to deal with anger without resorting to violence:

*   Learn to talk about your feelings - if you're afraid to talk or if you can't find the right words to describe what you're going through, find a trusted friend or adult to help you one-on-one.

*   Express yourself calmly - express criticism, disappointment, anger or displeasure without losing your temper or fighting. Ask yourself if your response is safe and reasonable.

*   Listen to others - listen carefully and respond without getting upset when someone gives you negative feedback. Ask yourself if you can really see the other person's point of view.

*   Negotiate - work out your problems with someone else by looking at alternative solutions and compromises.

Anger is part of life, but you can free yourself from the cycle of violence by learning to talk about your feelings. Be strong. Be safe. Be cool.

 

 

 

 

 

 

5. VIOLENT BEHAVIOR

If you recognize any of the warning signs for violent behavior in yourself, get help.

You don't have to live with the guilt, sadness and frustration that comes from hurting others.

Admitting you have a concern about hurting others is the first step. The second is to talk to a trusted adult such as a school counselor or psychologist, teacher, family member, friend or clergy. They can get you in touch with a licensed mental health professional who cares and can help.

6. CONTROLLING YOUR OWN RISK FOR VILONT BEHAVIOR

Everyone feels anger in his or her own way. Start managing it by recognizing how anger feels to you.

When you are angry, you probably feel:

*   muscle tension                              Head aches

*   accelerated heartbeat                       Cry

*   a "knot" or "butterflies" in your stomach   Roaring in ears

*   changes in your breathing                   Punching things

*   trembling                                   Grate teeth

*   goose bumps                                 Pacing

*   flushed in the face                         Hurt self

You can reduce the rush of adrenaline that's responsible for your heart beating faster, your voice sounding louder, and your fists clenching if you:

*     Take a few slow, deep breaths and concentrate on your breathing.

*     Imagine yourself at the beach, by a lake, or anywhere that makes you feel calm and peaceful.

*     Try other thoughts or actions that have helped you relax in the past.

Keep telling yourself:

*   "Calm down."

*   "I don't need to prove myself."

*   "I'm not going to let him/her get to me."

Stop. Consider the consequences. Think before you act. Try to find positive or neutral explanations for what that person did that provoked you. Don't argue in front of other people. Make your goal to defeat the problem, not the other person. Learn to recognize what sets you off and how anger feels to you. Learn to think through the benefits of controlling your anger and the consequences of losing control. Most of all, stay cool and think. Only you have the power to control your own violent behavior, don't let anger control you.

7. WARNING SIGNS VIOLENCE AGAINST SELF.

Some people who have trouble dealing with their feelings don't react by lashing out at others. Instead, they direct violence toward themselves. The most final and devastating expression of this kind of violence is suicide.

Like people who are violent toward others, potential suicide victims often behave in recognizable ways before they try to end their lives. Suicide, like other forms of violence, is preventable. The two most important steps in prevention are recognizing warning signs and getting help. Warning signs of potential self-violence include:

*   previous suicide attempts

*   significant alcohol or drug use

*   threatening or communicating thoughts of suicide, death,

    dying or the afterlife         

*   sudden increase in moodiness, withdrawal, or isolation

*   major change in eating or sleeping habits

*   feelings of hopelessness, guilt or worthlessness

*   poor control over behavior

*   impulsive, aggressive behavior

*   drop in quality of school performance or interest

*   lack of interest in usual activity

*   getting into trouble with authority figures

*   perfectionism

*   giving away important possessions

*   hinting at not being around in the future or saying good-bye

These warning signs are especially noteworthy in the context of:

*     a recent death or suicide of a friend or family member

*     a recent break-up with a boyfriend or girlfriend, or conflict with parents

*     news reports of other suicides by young people in the same school or community   

Often, suicidal thinking comes from a wish to end deep psychological pain.

Death seems like the only way out. But it isn't.

If a friend mentions suicide, take it seriously. Listen carefully, then seek help immediately. Never keep their talk of suicide a secret, even if they ask you to. Remember, you risk losing that person, Forever.

When you recognize the warning signs for suicidal behavior, do something about it. Tell a trusted adult what you have seen or heard. Get help from a licensed mental health professional as soon as possible. They can help work out the problems that seem so unsolvable but, in fact, are not.

I have worked with mentally deranged youth and adults and many times had to be a shadow, that is be at the side within an arms length 24 hours a day. One never knows what they might do and one needs to be alert and comforting at all time, assuring them that what they are experiencing is ok, but the mind needs to find release from such thoughts. That takes time and understanding on every ones part.

I have experienced here in Yakima a person that cut himself trying to commit suicide and was released from the hospital to go home. He went home and I received a call from his wife saying he is trying to commit suicide again. I went right to his residence and sure enough he threatened me, his wife and himself. He lay in his bed in a stupper, not wanting any help, so I called Mental Health, they had me call the Police in Yakima which I did. They were not able to do anything because he was not threatening them. I wonder why?

I filled a complaint along with the wife, and I was told, “more people need to complain about what is going on and how our hands are tied, we can’t go in until they threaten.” I wonder what does it take before we respond to any threat of life?

So when I talk about Suicide, I do not ever want to take it lightly, for life is very serious, and the heart of man is desperately wicked who can know it?

Thanks for your interest in what is going on in my ministry, I trust if there are any questions, you will please let me know.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Copyright 2005 Jerral Campfield, All rights reserved.