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Hello my name is Jerral Campfield and this web site is dedicated to Moral Recognition Therapy using Biblical principles. Please come back often to join me in understanding Gods hands are outstretched still to forgive.

Life Abundantly Part 9  E-mail
Contributed by Jerral Campfield   
Wednesday, 09 March 2005

Life Abundantly Part 9

 

As we look at the 16 to 21 late adolescences needs, we see a gradual emancipation from parents that become very tasking for all. Society is doing its best to place more responsibility upon this age than any time in my life and I feel that parents need to be careful of how much control they allow their teens to have.

They will be making vocational choices that will affect them for life and again parents can place too many expectations on them. They are growing in all there senses of responsibility, like who to court or date, and who will I marry?

The ability to achieve dependency in the role of sexual identity is beginning to be questioned and the need to know the truth is primary. There will be basic traumas between dependency and independency, sexuality and severe economical problems. Many will achieve success at this age and become involved in wanting freedom without responsibility and become strapped with anxiety states of mind and reactions negative, verses seeing things positive. Dealing with phobic reactions at School and Home is going to be the most challenging, because of all the choices one feels the need to accomplish now. Hysterias of many kinds can set in and spoil what is meant as being good. Like finishing School, waiting to get married until college is completed, just to list a few.

The need to understand the potential and abilities one processes is to be noted. Schools have the ability to test ones talents and skills that can benefit, so one does not have to go into a field that is totally foreign. The most important job one has is controlling his, or her own life, by reducing as much stress as possible. This will reduce a lot of personal disorders, such as gastro intestinal, bladder, speech, skin, hearing, visual, muscle spasms and nail biting. Then we have so many more disorders to day because of the consequences of drugs and alcohol upon the system. 

This is a time when they feel a sense of wanting to survive excessive control by parents, or within a marriage. Freedom is of most importance and youth of today seem to want to throw out all morality of right from wrong. So we are seeing right, becoming wrong and wrong, becoming right, in every area of living. This is causing lots of repression, depression and feeling of hopelessness, donít tell me what to do, who said I couldnít?

This is a reason that parents need to communicate with their youth and understand without being overly judgmental. It is necessary to know the difference of provoking your youth to anger and provoking to good works. Remember they are still living in your home, or care.

 

Now letís look at adulthood from 22 to 40 and we see needs of good sexual martial and family, work adjustment. They will become involved in community, participation in the church, school, or government. Those who have had good role models, will become more like their parents and it will baffle them. But many will not have had this role playing and will become addicted to sex, drugs, alcohol, gambling and even work alcoholic. Life begins to show how will we have sown and what we are beginning to reap. Life becomes beautiful during this time, or a pain in every area of a personís life?

They will become involved in productive work, and role playing, building character and a reputation that will enhance all around them, as they become economical independent. The ability to work out problems, rather than have circumstance defeat them will become rewarding, regardless if they get married or remain single.

Becoming a parent is beginning to drive many into marriage and with marriage come responsibility that is beyond anything imagined. The cycle is now realized and ones creative ability is fulfilled to the greatest degree the bigger the family gets.

There will be basic traumas like family stress, caused by intermarriage, economic hardship, natural disasters, illness, and accidents. But all of these are to build character not destroy us. There will be racial and religious discriminations to overcome, so one does not become angry and out of control.

The more frustration during this age the greater the need one seems to have of drugs, alcohol, and sexual liaisons without considering the consequences. Right seems to be too difficult and wrong is rewarding, so one becomes blinded and wonders what happen to my dreams, instead it is nothing but a nightmare.

The Church becomes the backbone of society during this time and we are seeing divorce in the Church, worse than the world, with 64 % divorce rate. The Church the last few years has accepted itís ok to separate because of anger, misunderstanding, abuse, yelling at one another, adultery and anything else we do not like in our mate.  Love is no longer seen as togetherness, it is seen as opposed to one another. Unity is not in our belief system, its all performance, or we have a reason to separate.

We have been married for 47 years and find marriage is still working, for itís a commitment that pays great dividends beyond what one ever expected, when we first laid eyes on one another. Sure there will be problems, but that gives one the ability to find an answer and solve them.

The only way one has a right to end a marriage is through adultery and that is not my thoughts it is the truth of the Word of God. Marriage is discipline in action that produces fruits beyond what one can possible imagine.  Blessing of fulfillment in every area of life, in the home, on the job, in the Church and community is ongoing and renewed every day.

 

Now letís look at the 41 to 65 year old middle age and their needs, like accepting life at a slower pace, physically and competitively. There is a need for hobbies and other community activities that gives one the assurance of well being. The ability to be productive in the work role, as one becomes mobilized in total resources toward achievement of personal happiness, become reality and very rewarding. One is not always tied down, but has the skills and talents needed for any circumstance.

Family becomes a source of satisfaction getting to watch kids and grandkids in School and Church performances without undue stress is a privilege. Family integration and there social influence in every day life is enriching.

There are traumas in menopause and climacteric changes, that need many times medical attention. Conflicts in relation to separation of children and parents from one another many times brings unfilled ambitions. Sexual declination is many times a hindrance to compatibility.

The need for survival is more intense than at 20 to 40 and personality distortions need to be dealt with, so one does not become over ridden with guilt and condemnation of not doing enough. This is a time when hind sight can become a stumbling block to future growth. Life is always one step at a time and we learn from our mistake and move on in the positive. Understanding that this is the first day of my life becomes more important the older one gets.

Now lets look at the person 66 on and see his/her needs; acceptance of physical, sexual and memory recession. But yet engaged in social activities and cultivating new friend, as they change communities or churches. Many will develop new interests and hobbies and continue to work according to limits of physical capacities.

The areas of traumas are going to increase such as loneliness, conflict with death of a friend, or mate, increases leisure time and retirement. Failing work physical and sexual activities, illness and fear full anticipation of death, then arteriosclerosis and senile psychoses just to list a few.

So one sees life is precious and we canít take anything for granted, the more we hid the Word of God in our hearts the greater the fulfillment and blessing.

I trust as youíve read what I have written you know that I am not the Doctor, but only one that as experienced just a little of what life is all about.

I will be back on the web next week with a different type of inspiration and trust if you have any thoughts, please write me and pray the Lord will bless all we do and say.

 


Copyright 2005 Jerral Campfield, All rights reserved.